Before you start reading this essay, just know that it is a little bit PG-13…

The 2 sexes – male & female – need each other to reproduce; however unfortunately, they don’t always get along or agree. In fact, they think differently. You may be attracted to your opposite sex or to your own, but it pays to have self-control about it. Besides, getting a date can be extremely challenging & even dangerous. (For either gender)

Bride&GroomJoke_ShorterVersion

Having someone to date can be nice, but you have to be careful about it & choose your mate wisely, because the dating market can be a very hostile environment. Plus, try not to seem “creepy” to whoever is in your opposite gender. On the other hand, you can be happy alone; balance the time you spend alone & with others.

You may be willing to get a spouse who will give you biological children & it’s natural that you would like to help the human species reproduce sufficiently, but the possibly stupidest question you can ever ask a woman (or even another man for that matter) is: “Will you have sex with me?”; you know why? Because adultery is WRONG! You morally can’t ask that stupid question to every woman you see; for all you know, the next one you ask could already be married! (Besides, the only one you’re supposed to have sex with is your girlfriend/wife) And even if she is unmarried, she won’t trust you if she just doesn’t know you. And of course that would be sexual harassment! So according to sexual logic, just don’t bother asking it!

If a sex-crazed man goes around asking every woman he sees to have sex with him, the women will almost always…(Wait a minute, delete the word “almost”!)…they’ll ALWAYS say “NO!” to such a stupid question!

LoveTrianglesSting!

Adultery is a sin that seriously complicates things in civilization. First of all, love triangles sting! The rules say that you can have only 1 girlfriend to date at a time. And of course, there are jealous types who are insecure about another guy stealing their girlfriends. (These types exist in both sexes) And whether a heterosexual couple is married or not, you can still be friends with both partners of the couple if they know you. However, do not violate the holiness of their marriage by doing you-know-what or you’ll lose the friendship of the couple BIG TIME! Even if they’re not married yet, you can still lose their trust!

According to my love triangle cartoon, lovesickness can put you at the loneliest angle of a love triangle; it feels mentally sharp! Lovesickness is a disease, but love is a necessity. When you’re in a long-term relationship, make sure that it’s true love first before you get married. It would be extremely heartbreaking if you get divorced after your partner seemed so nice & romantic before getting married. About 50% of all marriages end in divorce & that’s relatively big for the whole thing!

There are also the responsibilities of parenthood, if you get children. Divorce will tear your family apart & force you to pay child support, especially if you’re a man! If you can’t afford to pay the fees of child support, then you could get locked up for it! Is it really worth it to lose your freedom like that? Some currently living children in this world are already orphans, because:

  1. Their biological parents are dead.
  2. They have no family.
  3. Somebody probably committed adultery!

Yes, somehow, adultery causes more orphanhood. And without a proper education, some of these orphans can grow up to mistreat people of their opposite sexes! They’ll most likely become catcallers, rapists or prostitutes. To prevent this, children must be taught how to treat others with respect. However, indoctrination will spoil the purpose!

AngryBirdsParody
The goblinoids catcalled the Brass Ladies; the 4 seen in this cartoon are Danielle Lipstick, Chantelle Lipstick, Patience Muffet & Michelle Lipstick. Michelle is the one who was slung into the goblinoids’ unfinished building. Her kick of momentum & invincibility caused the structure to tumble down onto the catcalling goblinoids. She took a bite of the super spinach leaf in Chantelle’s hand to become invincible. Guess the goblinoids should have kept their mouths shut instead of catcalling! You can click on this image for a better view.

And another thing about dating: never try to date more than 1 girl at a time; it causes lady-irritating chaos! After you date your partner, you both can agree to have snoo-snoo, but it’s a reserved action that you can’t legally do in a public place! Make sure to use birth control if you’re not quite ready for parenthood yet. Sexual attraction is important in such a relationship, but if your partner is disloyal, that’s when it can become RAPE!

HeartbreakingHumbug5
This is a scene from 1 of the episodes of my cartoon series when David Pressed got “fresh” with Danielle Lipstick. Eventually, they made up with each other after this, as you can see in some of the images above this one.

Society already knows that the disloyal males either tackle their victims or drug them to sleep first; but the disloyal females use even trickier tactics, like lying about using birth control! Then comes the pregnancy, the birth of the child and the dreaded complicated consequences! And the family courts tend to practice bias against the men!

Men & boys just don’t have the glamorous powers that women & girls have; (Which is why males usually have to play the more active dating role, while the females can play the more passive dating role) however, women & girls don’t want a guy who likes them just for how they look! If you seem that way to them, it will creep them out! Do have some self-control about your sexuality. Study their personalities & let them get to know you as you meet them. But if the girl you date or befriend still refuses to do her part, then maybe she’s unromantic! Don’t let her waste any more of your time with her bullcrap! Abstinence is safer anyway!

Q: Is it possible to be happy without having sex?

A: Fortunately yes, besides, there are plenty of other ways to find happiness! Having sex is just 1 way to be happy, but it must be done responsibly; otherwise, guess who’s in trouble!

In conclusion, you can still be happy as a lifelong bachelor (or maiden) as long as you have a loving family & good friends. There are plenty of ways for a gentleman to be happy, other than sex. So if you don’t want to be labeled a catcaller or such, just be charming, polite & gentlemanly…and remember, whenever you meet any specific woman, just don’t bother asking that stupid question!